A Lesson in Tensile Strength, or Things Fall Apart

I first learned about Tensile Strength in my art history classes, studying Greek and Roman sculptures. It is because of tensile strength, or rather, the lack thereof, that so many ancient marble statues are missing arms and legs. Briefly stated, tensile strength is the ability of a material to retain it's shape despite the application of outward force. In order to counteract the effects of gravity, artists would add various sneaky support structures to their statues, such as incorporating the pastoral element of a carved tree to lean on, or strategically placed branches supporting a thin ankle.

It seems as though the grape arbor has more in common with ancient Greece than simply a celebration of Dionysus. You would think that with all of this fancy education I would have remembered about tensile strength. Not so. The 8 foot planks between the posts have begun to bend and split. As a result, in the near future we will need to replace the wood planks with galvanized wire. Sadly, this will negatively effect the aesthetics of the grape arbor, but will certainly increase it's ability to maintain the weight of the vines in the battle against gravity.

In happier news, the grapes appear to be entering the next phase in development known as First Bloom. This is when the "flower clusters" (what we thought were little baby grapes) begin to open. You can see the fuzzy little bunch in the middle of the picture. Apparently we're doing something right!

The grapes of Ella's wrath

If you look very hard, you can see the grapes...

Starting Up

My wife and I have always wanted a grape arbor. For our fourth anniversary we got each other the materials to build one in our back yard. We found plans for the grape arbor from eHow.com, and went to Lowe's to follow the lesson exactly. Our charge was to procure six 8 foot fence posts (we chose 4x4s) with the intent of planting them 18-24 inches below the surface (in order to go below the frost line.) We also had to get some wire or thin wood strips for the vines to grow on. We got the materials, which cost about $50, and retired to the house for the real work. Post hole digging is never fun; if at all possible, it is always best to avoid post hole digging. What made it worse was that there stood about a foot of parched clay on my way to 20 inches. It took both of us about four hours with very few breaks in 90 degree heat to dig all six holes. My neighbor let me use his tools, and luckily he also has a pick axe, which, although still very difficult, made breaking up the clay easier. We chose the hottest day of the spring for our project. There was not a large selection at the local nursury, so we purchased one muscadine vine of the Noble variety, a self pollinator. Our prefference would be for a dry grape, but to get started we went with a sweet option. The nursury also recomended a soil conditioner to mix in with the clay. It was about $25 at the nursery. After some disagreement we finally settled on the location for the actual plant, we thusly subplanted it, and began farming. What a rush!